T+1

Today is actually a bit of a rest day. The Malfalon should be completeing its effect today and/or tomorrow, leaving me at the lowest point according to my doctors, and I will stay feeling pretty low until my stem cells engraft and produce a new immune system, T+6 or so. I don't feel too bad though. I slept almost 14 hours last night, which I haven't done since I was a teenager, and couldn't have possibly achieved except that they kept giving me ativan to keep me asleep.

My spirits are pretty good this morning. I'm glad there's no more chemotherapy to go through, and I'm glad the transfer's complete. I feel a HUGE sense of relief at how well the first part went. I've seen a number of other transplant cases on my floor and many of them don't look like they are doing nearly as well. It was hard enough on me, I can't imagine what it would be like to really struggle through the procedure. Thank goodness for great nurses and good drugs. Better living through chemistry certainly applies.

I do still find myself wondering why me sometimes. I didn't pick this intentionally, nor would I given the chance. But that's a tough place to go, why do things happen to people? Is there a deeper explanation or is it simple randomness in the universe? Personally, I like to believe there's a deeper explanation, but having to go through the ordeal of NHL, I would like to have a better understanding of the explanation if it were possible. Maybe someday I'll comprehend it better.

Oh well, something for me to ponder and help pass the day. Going to eat a little breakfast, then I'll go for a bike ride and a shower. How's that for a busy day? Doesn't sound like much till I remember that the guy riding the bike has no immune system........ttfn