Happy Holidays

Having been through the trial of my life this past year, I cry at the thought of how much I have to be thankful for this year. Truly, it has been an incredible year. From the birth of my daughter, through my chemotherapy and my transplant, to the love and support of my family and friends, I feel like I have more to be thankful now than ever before. I am humbled at the beauty of life, it is AWESOME.

I have been remiss in not writing sooner, and I have received many notes and messages about not posting which I have all heard, thank you. All I can say is I'm sorry for not posting sooner. Having spent quite a bit of time pondering why I wouldn't post, I have come to the conclusion that a big piece of not posting was simply to create space between myself and the treatment. I needed some room to grow and heal. I'm doing much better now, and will work to post more regularly again. I feel posting is incredibly healthy and supportive for me, I just needed a little break.

For my update, I am doing amazingly well. I saw my oncologist last week and he was amazed at how strong I was and how good I looked. I have regained 10 lbs and my hair has been growing back steadily. My blood counts were still excellent, although I was slightly anemic(sp?), so he told me to eat a little more red meat. I have managed to catch a cold that has lasted almost a month now, but he said its really a series of colds as my immune system re-learns its resistances, which also explained why my allergies seem to suddenly be much worse than before. The best explanation my oncologist could give was that the destruction wiped out all of my antibodies, and they have to be re-built from scratch, which can take up to a year.

The only side effect that has been troublesome is my memory. I have developed memory issues again. My short term memory doesn't record things properly, and I have alot of trouble recalling events, dates and names. For example, if you asked me what I did on Thanksgiving day, I could tell you we drove to our lakehouse in Northern Wisconsin, but that would be it. I couldn't tell you where we ate lunch or dinner, how long the trip was, how many stops we made, or any other details of the trip. Needless to say, this is an EXTREMELY frustrating side effect, because I feel like a really smart man who woke up one day stupid. And, its incredibly hard because life is now full of land mines. I forget appointments or tasks that need to be done unless they are written down on a list that I am carrying with me. And, there are tons of lists that get set down places and forgotten about, which makes me feel like I'm living perpetually behind in getting anything done.

Hope and Honore are terrific. Hope is my pride and joy. She's a little bundle of joy, and absolutely has Daddy wrapped around her little finger. The worst part is, she's now old enough to know it and take advantage of it. She's standing on her own, and taking a few steps when holding on. She's really close to walking, but we're in no hurry for her to get there. Also, she's making lots of different noises, and lately has taken to shrieking, I think just to see how loud she can make a noise, although Honore says its because her deaf father speaks so loud all the time.

Honi's finally starting to recover from my ordeal. Having to keep running her dental practice, raise Hope, deal with family and friends, and worry about me, was about as much as anyone can got through. I am amazed by her strength and poise in getting through this crucible, so to me she has a lot of lattitude in coming back to normal. Stress wreaks havoc on the strongest of souls.

I want to extend a special thanks to everyone who has helped and supported us through this, in your cards and emails, letters, dinners, and phone calls to check in, you have all been AMAZING. The love and support we have felt has really kept us going. Coming home from the hospital was only the beginning, and the support we got after getting home has been incredible. So thank you all for everything you have done. We love you very much.

I hope everyone has a very Happy Holiday season. Merry Christmas to you all.

Love,

Travis